NEW BLOG AND NEW DIET

http://rillypsmfdiet.blogspot.com/

Off the wagon and in the gains lol

Not big gains mind you - I hover around 233 most of the time, but I can't seem to stop myself from cheating. Caused by letting myself really cheat a few times and getting re-addicted to food. ... mainly Carbs. CARBSSSS those devilish things. >.>

So yes I'm still on the juice and not eating a lot to cause real gains (minus last night because I ate a lot of Chinese pastries, giving me a 1.5 gain that might be gone tomorrow, depending if I keep eating crap today..)
I can't decide whether to just be in P3 or to keep trying to get myself back into P2 mode (NO CHEATINNNGGGG)
these past couple of seeks have been MEGGA hard because we've been MEGGGAAAA BROKE. So I've had to buy crap and eat crap because CRAP is all we've been able to afford. And seems to be all we're going to be able to afford or a while. I think I should buy a shit-ton of full fat Fage and live off of that because it loves me and really keeps you full. Downside - EXPENSIVE AS FUCKKKK!

Also need to get back into looking at lots of thinspo, I seem to notice when I'm not actively looking at inspiration I fall off into my fat-people ways and eat shit. =/ Doesn't help either that hubby has been bringing home crap or wanting me to cook crap food. I think I should just go back to beef and broccoli every night hahaha, but then he'd want rice or noodles.... Again with the carbohydrates!!!
Halloween didn't help either because of trick-or-treating and sugar sugar sugar candy candy candy. BUT, I did NOT make yummies this year (cookies, Rice Krispy Treats, etc). So I'm kind of proud of that. =] But I DID raid my son's candy bag for "the good stuff". (Hershey's and Reeses) which I'm not proud of.


Also have not been paying enough attention to my studies at all. Which I'm actually supposed to be doing as I type right now because I haven't read my chapters and I have an exam TODAY that I have to finish before leaving for my dads in 6 hours. Crap.


So there's my update.

What I Ate 8/22/11

Lets see...what DID I eat......?

Hamburger patty, nectarine, one quarter-sized cookie, diet rite soda...
and then later after going to the college for 3-4 hours and getting dehydrated and shit and depressed and ahhhh TODAY SUCKED.
We stopped at McDonald's on the way home.
I had a grilled chicken club sandwich, minus one side of the bun....not the one with mayo - i ate that one lol.
1 small mango-pineapple smoothie
3 chicken nuggets - maybe 4

Don't know and don't care about the calories today!!!


Weighed in about an hour ago (1am) and was only .5 above this morning so I'm expecting a loss in the morning so far. We'll see what it says before I go to bed before I decide what it's going to say in the morning.

I have my first in-person classes tomorrow, AND I HAVE NO TEXTBOOKS!

Hellooo COLLEGE! Down 1# Today

So I was down .5 yesterday, and today I'm down another 1lb! Yay 236!
I weighed before I went to MIL's for dinner and I was at 234.5!
Probably be more in the morning.
I was running around all day getting enrolled and getting my classes, so I didn't eat until like 2.30p and had a nectarine.
So we came to MIL's, and I had 4 tortillas and about 8oz beef. So we'll see, I'm seeing it as sort of a "steak and mug cake day" lol. So we shall hope it doesn't gain or stall me!

I'm guessing I'm around 600cals...probably more like 800.

But I finally got into college and enrolled, and classes start Monday and Tuesday. I'm really excited, but freaked out at the same time because I haven't gone to school in three years.
Haven't decided on a major, but because all the ones I'm thinking of are for the same type of degree I still take basically the same classes and all the same required classes.
I can't decide between History, Chinese, or English.

Ok I'm going to end this, tome to go home, I hate being near my MIL lol.

What I Ate 8/19/11 & WOO NEW COMPUTER!!

YAY NEW COMPUTER! Sony Vaio. I don't think I've EVER had a name brand computer.
Now I get to play games, and start college online...all kinds of exciting and fun stuff!

Here's what I ate:
Breakfast:
Denny's Senior Grilled Chicken Breast w/ Salad
Unsweetened Iced Tea
Total: 161cals

Lunch:
100g Non-fat Cottage Cheese
1 White Nectarine
Total: 145cals

Dinner:
Vitamin Water ZERO
most of a slice of Cheese Pizza (yeah I know I wasn't going to eat anything, it was my son's pizza but he didn't eat like half of it and i was tired of holding it for him.
Total: 290 cals

Total for the day: 596 cals


Maybe now that I have a computer I can start  "Vlogging" =D ....ok probably not until I figure out how to not look like a loser doing it. =/

Have a great night =] Big losses everyone!!!

YES IT WORKED

So I have invented my own correction day and it worked AWESOMELY!

DOWN 3LBS THIS MORNING!! INTO NEW NUMBERS! FINALLY!

Will write later, just thought I'd post my results!

Reply to BB

Hi! Sorry it wouldn't let me reply in a comment:
No it wasn't my first VLCD or my frst round.
I don't remember the post you commented on, 8/14 I think? But I had been at my dad's for a week and was basically cheating all over. Not even for hunger, just because when I'm there I eat whatever ends up in front of my face, BAD ANCIENT HABIT.
So I'm trying to get back on track but I bonked up and ate crap yesterday...
Sooo I spent today attempting to fix it.

If this doesn't answer your comment, ask again please lol, I'm really bushed tonight, long day.

And yes I know if I eat clean the urges will subside. :-) I just have to keep telling myself to stick to the plan! I have sooooo far to go still!
Hoping for 200 by Halloween.

No computer....

So hubby broke the comp charger so he's going to get me the new computer I need for school and later we'll buy the plug for the old comp and give it back to my dad.

Until then I'm on my phone.

Gained 2# back from yesterday's horrible escapade.
Did an egg white and protein shake day, right now I'm sitting on 499cals, 9g fat, 21 g carbs, and ----- dun dun dun, 79g PROTEIN! Awesome right!?
I feel great.
Even though I had a emotional breakdown earlier because I spilled my dinner (egg whites) on the floor-through in liquid form. I BAWLED.
Tom should be here soon.

Feeling awesome now, had dinner (bought carton egg whites) and now I'm eating for hubby to get home and I'm ready for bed lol.

I feel skinnier if that makes any difference?
We'll see in the morning.
I really hope I lose something and stay in the freaking 230s!

If you read this far, it won't hurt to click my ads and check out some great sites!

About To See New Numbers!!!

DOWN 2LBS TODAY!!!! So I'm feeling back on track, FINALLY!
Back to where I was when I went to my dad's and ate WHATEVER FELL IN FRONT OF MY FACE.
So , if I lose just 1lb in the morning, I'LL BE SEEING NEW (not previously lost) WEIGHT!!!


OMFG I HATE THE FREAKING INTERNET!!!!!!
I had this entire blog written out and I pushed "publish", and POOOOOOOF!
FUCKING GOOGLE BASTARDS!!!!!
STOP BUYING EVERYTHING I LOVE AND FUCKING IT UP!!!!
I HATE YOU GOOGLE PEOPLE!!!!
(Did I mention that Google flipping ruined YouTube as well? YouTube used to be good before Google bought it and effed it all up.)


Ok, back to re-writing my blog.

So I don't know what I'm going to for meals or eating today. I might have a hamburger for lunch and then have 3 hard boiled eggs for dinner again.
I was thinking about doing 4-1 scoop protein shakes instead of meals for the rest of the week to kick this weight. I could do it every other day, meals, shakes, meals, shakes...
I need to really get rid of 10# this last week I have left of HCG, so I'll be in the 220s for next round (Halloween challenge).

I might do a mini load on Friday or Saturday, to kick start the last week's losses....Unless this is my last week, then I'm screwed. It's all going to go by however much HCG I have left. So I need to kick it into gear RIGHT NOW. To get where I need to be. Losing weight I've already lost is soooooo retarded!!!!! I hate myself for letting it happen. 3 TIMES THESE PAST MONTHS (July-August).
I've only lost 13lbs since July 5th!!!! Ridiculous!
I need to get my ass in gear and get to work on losing this fat if I really want to make it to goal by next spring. I should be able to make it to the 130s by Christmas!!!! BUT I'VE GOT TO GET MY ASS IN CHECK!!!

What I Ate 8/15/11

SOOOOO
Instead of making meatloaf, I made hubby a hamburger and I had 3 hard boiled eggs.

Here's what I ate today:
4oz Lean, thin, low/no fat sirloin steak w/ 1 tbs of mayo
1 SF Hunt's Snack Pack Gello cup
1 Diet Rite Pure Zero Cola
3 Large Hard Boiled Eggs (with yolks)

Grand total: 490 calories!!!!

So I'm done for the day and I have to say, I'm really NOT hungry, just the normal mental cravings...like cookies... LOL

Can't really think of anything else to talk about so I'm going to end this earlier than I normally would. If I think about something later on, I'll update.

P3 and BORED - Waiting for the Contest to START!

Soooooooooooooooooooooo.....
I've been on "P3" for about a week, and I'm just to 3lbs over LDW (actually I've lost from the technical "LDW" of 247 - I think it was, but I'm going by the lowest weight I got during that week - 243lbs) today. Tomorrow I'm sure that will be back down so I'm not going to freak out and force myself to do a steak day.
PLUS, I have no steak!.... I guess I could do a Fage day, but honestly that stuff makes me sick, it's so thick and tastes like cream cheese.
I only like cream cheese on bagels tyvm, lol..

ANYONE WHO WANTS TO JOIN THE "HCG BIGGEST LOSER 21-DAY 4TH OF JULY CHALLENGE" FIND OUR GROUP ON FACEBOOK!!!
4th July HCG 21 Day Round Challege
You must have your supplies by this weekend! Loading is July 2-4 with VLCD1 on July 5th.
You will be required to post a picture of your scale/losses every morning.
Cheating is completely NOT ALLOWED.
We will be following Dr. ATW Simeons' Original Protocol.
No REVISED PROTOCOLS!!! NO EXCEPTIONS!
So join the group if youre interested!!!
PRIZE is a FULL 30 DAY ROUND KIT!



Moving on, I need to remember to take my Apidexin when I'm not doing the HCG, because I don't want to just stabilize right now, I want to keep losing. Apparently (according to Dr. Al Sears and some other Drs) the chromium in my Apidexin helps you lose weight and build muscle! I never bothered reading up on the actual history of the ingredients, but I was looking up more info about how eating more fat is better for you, and I passed over Dr. Sears' blog on how when chromium is given to pigs they lose fat mass and gain muscle.

Now I'm watching the Drs and they're talking about people being fat an thinking that they're NOT fat.
And skinny people thinking that they ARE fat. LMAO.
The current "overweight" meter was reduced though, making previously "overweight" people "obsese".
I'm currently a "Class 2 Obese" person. My waist is 40". That's only 10" over what "Dr. Oz" says is good.
Everyone has their own fucking idea of what's right.

I think just to prove the bullshit, I'm going to get down to the lowest "healthy weight" for my BMI, i.e.: 115lbs where I will probably look like a walking skeleton. Just to prove the fucking Drs Association or whomever wrong!


Back to the Apidexin topic....

I REALLY NEED TO REMEMBER TO TAKE IT!!
I completely LOVE this stuff. It works. And if it ends up not working someday, it still gives me great energy for random stuff, like exercise, or just cleaning the house. Stuff I normally procrastinate on.
I take 1-2 capsules in the morning usually, sometimes 3, I never get any side effects (like jittery or sick), just the great side effect of FORGETTING TO EAT, lol. And I tend to eat really well, so what I do force myself to eat, probably helps out (right now, stuff like Fage, eggs, yogurt, fruit, and tomatoes and bell peppers, chili peppers, etc.) Lots of protein, fat, and fruits and veggies. I might have a couple of tortillas or something, basically I try to stay away from grains and sugars. Which is getting hard because I REALLLY want a bowl of cereal sometimes lol. Luckily right now we're out of milk lol.



OH AND:
My new favorite lotion right now is The Anti-Aging w/ pro-retinol and collegen by Vaseline (big purple bottle), it has the normal collegen lotion smell (pretty nice), leaves you smooth-feeling and not greasy. LOVE IT. I like using collegen lotion (when I can't find or don't bother looking for my Dead Sea lotion) for my stretch marks, and to prevent getting wrinkles.
Te only downside is that the Retinol makes you more susceptible to the sun and sunburns, so you HAVE to make sure you use a sunscreen or clothes that cover your body well, or you WILL burn.
(But if you don't stay out forever, it does help for tanning lol. I'm a great caramel color right now and this time last week I was a ghost.) =]

VLCD4 HHCG - Apidexin Day 13

I'm up .5lb this morning, but that's because of Tuesday's cheat I think.
So no more cheating!
Anyways,
I took 3 Apidexin this morning....basically just for the hell of it, and I have to clean the house today...at some point, so I needed the extra energy. So far I don't feel any different than normal and I took it 3 hours ago...So as usual, no side-effects with Apidexin.

I stayed pretty full all day yesterday until the time when I should have went to bed. I was expecting a loss because when I weighed at night I was 246, but alas, 246 this morning aswell.
Not worried about it, should have a good loss tomorrow.

I made my lunch already, chicken and a tomato, but I just did my pellets, so I haven't started eating yet. I'll eat when I'm done writing this post, that should be plenty of time since the pellets are already dissolved (I put them in before I started cooking).

My son is driving me insane as usual and I don't have any cigarettes. So I guess I'll have to get dressed and take a walk down to the gas station before I lock him in his room for the rest of the day lol. At least he doesn't seem too interested in the TV today, but I know if I turn it off he'll freak out, even though he's not watching it. He's trying to kill a banana by sitting on it.
Ok now he's just being a fucking weirdo.
He desn't even want to eat the damn thing, just to flippen destroy it.
BOYS!!!!!! Are freaking nuts!!!!



So if I feel like it I'll update tonight.

I went swimming last night too, so maybe that led to the gain as well.
Oh well, no biggie.

VLCD3, HHCG - Apidexin Day 12

Down 2lbs this morning, so I'm back down to 245.5lbs! Tomorrow I'm hoping for 243.5 lol. It would be nice to have a steady drop of 2lbs/day for this first week, because I know next week it will be like .5 all the time.

I am back on the Apidexin because I did way too many small cheats yesterday, and just because I had a loss doesn't mean I couldn't have had a bigger loss if I wouldn't have ate those pretzels.
So I took my Apidexin because the hunger suppression is freaking amazing with it. I wouldn't even had remembered to eat my orange this morning if it weren't for my son having been hungry and pulling me into the kitchen.
So we'll see how my loss is tomorrow with the Apidexin, I figure since it's herbal and the capsule is vegetable it won't have a bad effect.

So that's where I stand so far today. I'm planning on having a hamburger patty and tomato for lunch and chicken (probably with broccoli) tonight.

If I have something to say later, I'll post an update.

VLCD2 hhcg update

Ok. So today I didn't do as well as yesterday, which is making me remember why I started doing the protein shakes in the first place, when I eat food I never stop eating! It's really depressing. I had chicken soup with broccoli for lunch, that was fine, an orange, some cantaloupe, and like 1 strawberry dipped in chocolate delight (coconut oil mixture with cocoa powder and stevia). I wasn't hungry today until I got mad at Omar for being a fucking douche and shit....argh... so I guess I'm an emotionl eater? That's not normal for me....maybe it was because I was almost out of cigarettes.
So anyways after the fruits, for dinner I ended up having a tiny piece of chicken, a couple of bites (literally) of broccoli, and later on I cheated with pretzels, a SF fudgecicle (wrong brand so they were fricken nasty - do not by the "cool classics" fudgecicles! stick to popcicle brand!), and a SF jello cup. I had a few too many pretzels...Oh I did have some salsa with white corn chips earlier, but only like 5 and I'm counting the salsa as my second veggie.


So that's where I stand. About 685 calories.

I'll probably have a loss if this HHCG stuff works.
I would if I was doing Rx injections, so we'll see, if not, maybe my friedn Jo has a bottle of 2000iu I can nab from her....


I hope I'll feel better tomorrow and won't be prone to eat so much.
Or stick to cheating with my 5 calorie gello, lol.
I wish I had celery since it basically doesn't have any calories, but I don't, and my last cucumber went bad, so I don't even have that!

VLCD2 - hhcg pellets

Alright, I'm going to try skipping the Apidexin today, #1 to check my hunger, #2 to see if it makes me lose less without it while on the HHCG.
I've taken my first dose and I'm strarting to get hungry, so Idk if I'll be able to make it without the Apidexin. =/
We shall see!

I'm out of protein shake powder, so all I have to eat is fruit veggies and frozen chicken and chicken broth for soup. So soup it what I am having. It also reminds me that my microwave is broken and I need to get it fixed while I still have the warrantee, which means I need to go print out my reciept from Best Buy.

I think my blender's starting to go aswell. At this rate I am not going to keep buying stuff from best buy because all the shit I get there breaks! I barely got the microwave in January, and the blender last month. And they're both Oster brand which is a REALLY GOOD BRAND. So WTH!?!?!?!

VLCD 1 UPDATE

So today I woke up late, took my pellets, took my Apidexin, ate an orange, and for lunch and dinner I had a protein shake (each) with strawberries and 2 packets of Pure Via (basically Truvia with the texture of Sweet 'N Low).
So I'm pretty much ready for bed and hoping for a big loss in the morning.
If my loss isn't as good as I think it should be I'll skip the Apidexin tomorrow and see if that works.

Apidexin Day 11 - VLCD w/ HHCG Pellets Day1

Ok so this morning I took my pellets, and then after those were done (about 30 mins later) I took my Apidexin, and then another...well 2 hours lol because it's 2:06pm now, I ate an orange. I have to admit, I did have a bite of banana around the time when I took the Apidexin.

So I'm feeling really good right now, I am sad that I didn't get to make my Alfredo last night because we waited too late to eat and by then it was too late to cook and faster just to get food.
I didn't even eat it all so I also feel guilty for wasting that money, but I guess my son & hubby will eat it throughout the week.

I'm not feeling hungry today, I think as long as I'm doing something (like being online), I don't think about eating, but I am having cravings for the alfredo I didn't get to make.

Tonight for dinner I'm going to make chicken strip fry or something and skip the rice. Also, I'm out of shirataki noodles, so it's going to be a very boring dinner for me, but as long as I lose at least my loading weight tomorrow it will be worth it.
Since it's so late already tonight, I'll have a protein shake in about an hour with strawberries. Maybe I should nix the stir-fry tonight and just make today and protein shake and fruit day.
I'll probably drop 5lbs! lol.

I guess I'll have to think about it.

Apidexin Day 9 - hCG Pellets Load Day 1

So this morning I was up 1.5lbs, which is good considering that I ate half a pizza last night.
I am noticing that I look thinner, so maybe I'm losing inches.

I took my first hcg pellets when I got up today, and as I write right now I have my second dose under my tongue. Keeping them under the tongue is kind of hard, but I'm sure I'll get used to it. They are sweet and melt pretty evenly though.
We'll see how well they work when I start the VLC (very low calorie) days on Monday... Well technically on Tuesday when I have my first loss.
I'm going to try to stay as on protocol as possible, I don't think I'll have a problem since I'm taking the Apidexin too, I probably wont have any urge to eat at all.

My Hubby went paintballing with our neighbor earlier.
I know I said I would wait, but when he gets home I want to go to Ross and get a pair of pants/pedal-pushers since all I have are three pairs of pants and one pair is ripping in the thighs, another is heavy material and almost falling off! And the last pair is hiding in a pile of dirty clothes.
I need pants desperately and I don't think these are going to last much longer!
Maybe I'll be able to fit in a pair of 20s or 18s! Exciting!

So I've been trying not to swallow and I just noticed that my pellets are completely gone. Lol, I've been sitting here, focusing on not moving my tongue and they were gone already! I feel like a dork haha.

So eating the pizza last night made me really sick to my stomach and it still hurts but it seems to be getting better. I just stuffed as much tuna salad and cheese as I could, but maybe I'll be able to eat more if my stomach stops hurting.
I really need to load well this time. I haven't been loading good at all these past couple of rounds and I feel like I could've done much better if I would have loaded better.

Wish me luck!!

Apidexin Day 7

Week one of using Apidexin! That must mean that today's Thursday.
So I'm back up 3lbs even, but I know exactly why! I ate alot of carbs and fat yesterday. More than I usually eat, because I had a craving that I couldn't recognise and after eating everything it still wasn't gone.

Breakfast/Lunch: Bacon, Eggs, 1 piece of toast, banana
Snack: 1c Quaker Oatmeal Squares ceral w/ 1c 1% milk
Dinner: Spaghetti w/tomato sauce and chicken,green beans
Snack: 1 Corn tortilla, tuna salad (theres 500 cals by itself!), beef hot dog, 1 piece of bread (whole grain, nutty kind)
a Couple tablespoons of peanut butter.
Possibly a glass of orange juice and milk in there somewhere

Anyways, that's alot of food. it also wasn't a small helping of spaghetti, carbs are pure sugar you know!

So I'm not really worried about the weight. I figure it will be gone tomorrow after I eat well today.
It could also be muscle weight, because I exercised pretty good yesterday.


My HCG pellets should be here today, it got to and left Phoenix last night, so it should be delivered today!
I still can't decide whether to load this weekend or keep on P3 for another week or so. Or keep with the Apidexin over summer without HCG.
I want to for sure make my 225 goal by the 4th of July, if not below that. So I guess I should just do my HCG and stop whining!
I can't believe I'm so close to 200. I know, I'm not really "close" to 200, but when you think of where I cam from, this close >> [] to 300lbs! YES I AM ALMOST TO 200lbs! =D
Or the thought that I can probably get there in like 2 months!
Needless to say, I'M STOKED!



I love Kate Winslet!
And I just found out she's the same height as me!



And I know she's always like FUCK SKINNY, but she's never really been fat, let alone categorised as "morbidly obese," so I'm sure she'd understand my idea of skinny, because really, she is it!
In all of her thick, and now thin, glory.


Domino is the only movie I like Keira Knightly in:

But I like this picture of her too:


Here's another picture of Christina Ricci:

Apidexin Day 6

Down another pound! That makes 5lbs in 6 days!
And yesterday I actually forgot to take my Apidexin until too late, so I skipped it. I did remember to take it today so we're all good.

For the record, I've been taking 2 in the morning and one at lunch (if I remember).
I've been staying up really late (like 2am) and I don't know if that's because of the Apidexin or because I just like staying up late and talking to my old friend from high school. Since I didn't take the Apidexin yesterday, but still stayed up until 1.30am, I'm going to say it's because of the high school friend, who only freaking talks to me at night!

I don't remember if I had said earlier that I ordered my HCG pellets, but I did and they were shipped yesterday in Texas, so I should get them either Friday or Saturday (post office says Saturday), I don't know why I would take long, Texas is like 5 hours away from here. My Apidexin came from Utah and it only took 2 days (minus the lazy mailman) and Utah is a much longer drive from where I live.

Anyways, lets get to moving on,
DOWN 5 POUNDS! that's fricken awesome! I was not expecting to actually lose weight. Especially since I have been slacking on the workout department. And the weight just came off in these past 2 days!
That just proves for you Apidexin "users" (I use quotes because most of the people who complain about Apidexin never make it through the first week before they start bitching) who complain about gaining weight or not losing: I gained weight on both Sunday and Monday morning this week, went from 248 to 250.5 and now (Wednesday)I'm at 245 even. STOP FUCKING BITCHING AND ACTUALLY USE IT AS DIRECTED AND YOU'LL GET RESULTS!!!
I followed the www.Apidexin.com's directions (Take the detoxufree for the first 3 days WITH you Apidexin dose, and then keep going with the Apidexin when the Detoxufree is gone), and I FREAKING LOVE APIDEXIN, I have NO HUNGER WHATSOEVER, I have more energy to do stuf like clean the house more often or workout, chase after my kids, whatever. No jitters, no nausea, no stomach ache, no throwing up, NO SIDE EFFECTS EXCEPT MY AWESOME 5LBS BEING GONE!
I am so glad I took the plunge and decided to try this pill! lol.
I'm just like everyone else, I've tried all the pills! None of those ones at the store work, and who even know's what's in them.
Did you know that Alli makes you poop yourself!? And to think last year I was going to try that stuff! Gross!

I'm going to watch my results for the next few days and if it keeps going like this I might postpone my next round of HCG (that I was going to start early) and keep going for my Apidexin summer, like I had planned to!

P.S.: My friend Jo has to work this weekend so there will be no loading pool party =[