Ughhhh I SUCKKK

So as you can tell from the title. I totally suck!!! I just can't seem to keep from eating. I don't think it's hunger, I think it's just because I can't have certain foods, or because I'm really bored and when I'm bored I eat everything in sight, or something. IDK, I have food issues. I just wish I had the type of issues that make me stay AWAY from food instead of eating the world's food supply!
So I'm back to 240 (I don't remember my weight from my last post, so I imagine that it was lower and I was on a better track than today). ANd I really wants to lose 20lbs this week (and bring myself down to 228 or so) but that doesn't look like it's happening. Of course I still have 5 days until the week is over on Sunday. Maybe this weekend in Las Vegas will drop me a few pounds? Last year when I went to Vegas I lost 10lbs! (Including all kinds of food and the "Buffet of Buffets!" 7 buffets for $50 in a 24hr period.) So I'm hoping for the best.
Honestly my plan for this trip is "eat nothing and and only drink vodka and diet soda". Which will save alot of money, but I think on the last day we'll get the "buffet of buffets" again and do our "tour of Vegas food" lol.
I think I wouldn't be so stressed if I at least got down a little before we leave on Friday night or Saturday morning.

I'm really tired of being fat and all of this failure is really taking its toll on my mental state. I'm really on the verge of a complete meltdown and for some reason nobody understands, not even my fellow dieters.
Maybe some of my Ana friends?
It shouldn't be this hard to get where I want to be. I don't know why I keep sabotaging myself. I hate my fat.

Hate the weekends!!!

SOOOO, I was downt to 236.5 on Friday right? WELL NOT ANYMORE! Thanks weekend and cheating and being a stupid FAILURE like ALWAYS!!! Shit. I just can't give myself a break can I?
So I've got an all new high for keepig on track and making sure I don't screw it up again. On the bright side I was down 6lbsfor the week yesterday, and I know if I drink a ton of water today I'll find out that today's gain is just water, but still, it SUCKS to see that scale go up doesn't it?!!

Today I'm doing a protein day like I did last week:

Breakfast:
3 egg whites, 1 yolk
2tbs homemade salsa
(already eaten)

Planned for the day:
Lunch:
7oz grilled chicken
2 cups lettuce (this is my worst enemy, I HATE lettuce unless it's drenched in ranch with cucumbers and stuff)
3-4 strawberries

Dinner:
4oz grilled chicken
2tbs homemade salsa
 Carbohydrate (7%) 6.15g

Fat (35%) 20.7g
Protein (58%) 74.3g
532kcals
 
 
And that with TONS of water should get me back down to where I'm supposed to be. Or at least back to what I was yesterday at 238.5. Though I'm hoping for the 236.5 I was at on Friday.
 
 

TGIF - Week 1 almost done

So my ring is trying to fall off, which is kind of sad because hubby getting it fixed was one of my Christmas presents and pretty soon I'll have to take it off and wait until I'm done losing weight to get it re_sized smaller. But for the next ring I buy I won't have to get it re-sized bigger, I can just take the standard size 7! OR - What if I have to get it re-sized SMALLER?! How crazy would that be?? I've always be a size 9.5-11 in rings and pretty soon I'm going to be able to buy "fashion" jewellery from store that sell those "cheapo" rings (quotations used because that shit is cheaply made, but not cheap).
I'm really excited to think about the fact that if I STICK TO THE DIET REGIMEN, I WILL be wearing those size 5 skinny jeans I have hanging on my wall THIS SUMMER, IN LAS VEGAS! Ok, maybe jeans are not the smartest things to wear to Vegas in summertime, but unless my legs look absolutely FABULOUS I will not be showing them!!!!
I don't believe that losing all this weight is going to make me feel better about my individual body parts, especially because I imagine that I'm going to have lose skin like all of my older counterparts doing the diet. Yes, I know I'm at least 20 years younger than most of them and my skin has a lot more elasticity, but let's face it, I'm fat, and my body probably won't look like a normal person my age's body. On the other hand, maybe I'll get lucky, like I always have been regarding my awesome features and body and luckiness, maybe I'll have an awesome non-flabby body when I'm done with all of this!
Thinking about the bad things that could happen with losing all this weight probably shouldn't be my focus, right? I should probably think of the people MY AGE, and even a few older people who have lost tons of weight and don't have flabby skin. I can always take baths in lotion and do some of those skin tightening wrap thingies they have at fancy-schmancy spas.
What I'm REALLLLLY excited about for this Summer is doing my nails. It will be the first time I won't be a fat chick with fake nails! As a nail technician, I will NEVER tell anyone they are too fat for fake nails. It's never been said to me and I will never say it. BUT--- My nails are TINY and my hands are FAT, so it looks really weird to me to have fake nails, although I really love them... for about a week.
I always get excited about doing my "Vegas Nails" every year. I love having an excuse to have super sparkly, long, and LOUD nails. Maybe I'll even let my real nails grow longer so I can have super long fake nails for Vegas. STRIPPER NAILS! Hahaha, yeah that would be friggen great.

So with all my whining, dreaming, and ranting this morning I have killed an hour of "Gee, I'm bored. I would really like to eat something, because when I'm bored I like to eat...." So that's pretty promising.

I'm down 2lbs today, 8# since Jan. 1.
8lbs in 6 days can't be beat right?

Now I just have to figure out what I want to eat today. Whether I want to have protein shakes or another protein day with tons of chicken like yesterday.
I really don't feel like protein shakes, or the lettuce that I'm supposed to eat with the chicken.
Have I mentioned that I HATE HATE HATE lettuce?
Yeah, I do. It's gross. I'm an iceberg lettuce person, and that's "not healthy enough, it doesn't have enough nutrients..." blah blah.
I even tried making it into a salad yesterday with green leaf lettuce, mushrooms, green onions, salt and pepper, some Italian seasonings... It still sucked.
Give me some good old broccoli or green beans any day, I HATEEEEE leaf greens.

 If I think of anything to say I'll probably write more later, but for now I'm going to go have some egg whites for my wonderful breakfast. The only thing crappy about dieting is getting used to food that really doesn't taste that great, no matter how many seasonings you put into it and how much you smile about it all. I will probably be over the anxiety of eating crap like egg whites in about a week and be all happy-go-lucky Happy happy joy joy about it later one, especially when I get back into the 220s and below.
OH! That reminds me, have I mentioned that I'm thinking of just doing a super long round? (As long as my weight loss stay around 1#/day average) I feel like taking breaks from hCG is what really makes me fall off the wagon and fail in subsequent rounds. I get too used to eating normally, So maybe I just should never eat normally but stay on the diet as long as it takes me to gt to goal. (Again, as long as I average 1#/day). Of course as a female, I have a stronger chance of not getting the losses I really want, since men lose the weight alot faster than women and can normally average 1-2lbs/day. All I need to keep me focused and interested in the food and dieting is that 1#/day. Honestly I know I could do it if I tried. SO I WILL TRY!!! And I will make all of my goals, and someday (like nearer to Christmas 2012, or Apocalypse 2012 - whichever you believe will be happening) I WILL BE SOMEBODY'S THINSPIRATION!!! It's kind of exciting right?

I really need to keep in ind that I possibly won't get the sagging skin and kangaroo pouch thing, because I'm super young. What I'm more worried about than that is really literal "saddlebags" on my thighs, and a saggy butt, because I have huge thighs and a giant butt.
But in all honestly I think my age is going to save me from those consequences of having ever been fat.
We will see. -crosses fingers- I really don't want saggy skin anywhere.
I'm not so worried about my stretch marks either for some reason, I guess because I've never really noticed them I'm not so worried about them. I do notice them more now that I'm thinner, but I just figure with plenty of Dead Sea lotion they'll disappear like they always have.

Ok, ENOUGH RANTING!!!
Have a great day with great losses my friend!!!! <3

R3P2D4?

Jan 5, 2012

3 eggs whites, 1 yolk
2tbs homemade salsa
9oz chicken breast
2 cups lettuce
2 diet hansens soda
3.5oz chicken breast
2tbs homemade salsa
650kcals, 92.6 protein, 25.5 fat, 7.6 carbs



Have I mentioned that I'm just going to call this round #3 even though it's like #8? Lol.

I have alot of weight to lose by this summer when I meet up with all of my dieting buddies in Las Vegas, NV. 108.5lbs to be exact, by mid-June if possible. It is possible. I'm doing the hCG diet afterall... I wish I would have stuck to the diet during the Fall and holidys this winter. But I didn't so I'm still stuck around the same weight as I was last July basically. I kick myself because I could have been at ultimate goal by now and I am down only like 7-10lbs since July 2012.


I got down to 228.5 and worked my way back to 240. Can we say FAILURE?
But I'm doing well so far this round. It's VLCD 5 and I'm down 6lbs. Today I did a high protein day so I'm hoping for a big loss in the morning, here's to hoping. -crosses fingers-

My friend, who is just a litte bit taller than I, says at 130 she's between a size 0-4. I'm hoping when I get there I will be too, but I know I will be at least a size 7-10. At least I'll be over 100lbs lighter than I was at this time last year. And it's still comforting to know that I have lost almost 40lbs and kept it off, I'm not worried about any of it coming back, but after Vegas this summer I will probably do a short short round just to acquire a buffer zone for any gains I might encounter.
I can't wait to be skinny for the first time in my life and I know that in order to make it to any of my goals I have to keep to the plan and stay on track and on protocol. NO CHEATING!!!! If I have to live off of protein shakes for 6 months by-golly I will!!!

Can't Sleep

So I took a few sleeping pills, watched a couple of movies, went pee a few times, and I still can't sleep, so now I'm listening to some sort of "documentary" or "self help" video talking bout health and weight loss and I've compiled a few photos for late night thinspiration so I don't go and gorge on something, I DID however, eat an apple before doing so.

When I weighed before the apple I weighed the same as this morning, hoping for a big los in the morning =]

And tomorrow I will do a protein day possibly.

Food for today:

1 cup Turkey Chili/Goulash

1 cup 0% Fage

3 strawberries

2 gingerbread cookies (60 cals)

1 42oz bottle of orange flavored mineral water

Total: around 550kcals

12/30/12 - Day before actual "LOAD"

I've decided to take my injections starting today so the HCG can be sure and get into my system. (I still have to get it out of the freezer but anyways...)
By Monday all the bad food should be completely out of my house (whether eaten or thrown out or given away, whatever.), and Monday I will start VLCDs.
So excited to be back on a strict 500kcal diet, you have no idea! This past week I have just been sick at the thought of food (and certain smells, and my cigarettes, making me wonder about pregnancy and contemplating suicide, lmfao jk don't get your panties in a bunch.) But for real, I refuse to accept pregnancy anymore, and I'm half-contemplating staying on hCG continuously until I reach goal, half hoping to build an immunity against it as a precaution against future pregnancy. (Yes, that's what immunity actually does, it causes you to have problems staying pregnant because your body sees the hCG and stuff "down there" as a threat. I.E: Can cause miscarriage.) I've decided as long as I'm with "hubby" I refuse to have any more children. I would like to find a mate that I am compatible and IN-LOVE WITH before I have another child(or children).

Moving on:

I'm really excited to start this new year with a fresh start and it's exciting that this will be my first ever "New Year's Resolution"!!!! So yeah, I'm pretty stoke about that anyways, and stoked to have so much to look forward to this year including my Las Vegas trip this summer with my other dieting girlfriends (by which time I should have hopefully at least reached 130 - 15lbs from my ultimate goal of 115).

I am sick of letting myself be mine own enemy and I refuse to let me sabotage myself. LOL. That sounds even crazier than all the things I've stated above, but it's true, I am my own worst enemy (besides the obvious fatness). I need to get busy today and this weekend and clean out all of my cupboards or eat all the bad shit for loading on Sunday (I think I'll just drink tomorrow haha...yeah I wish, I don't drink. =/ ) and On Monday all that should be left in my house is P2 foods!! I'm hoping - we're kind of broke until next week (7 Jan) so I'm going to make the best out of what we do have around the house - chicken and beef, possibly some broccoli, I think I have some frozen and canned veggies like peas and grean beans, even though those aren't P2, at least they're GREEN. I have my slide show thinspo going along on my computer background/wallpaper thingy, so everyday I am reminded about my goal and the fact that I really need to step it up the rest of this winter and for Spring and lose this fucking weight so I can be hot for the first time ever in time for summer!!! I mean, I'm fucking gorgeous, but I really need a body that fits my face like my mother has been telling me since I got fat when I was like 7-8. "You'd be so pretty if you lost some of that weight honey." Plus, if I'm ever going to go home to Idaho and see my Aunt & Uncle and my other Uncle and my skinny friggen metal-head cousins, I WANT TO BE FUCKING SKINNY. Especially to rub it in my Aunt's face that I'm not the fat one of the family anymore. I'm sick of being the fat one in the family, you know? I'm sick of her diet food and her "Why don't you join weight watchers, look how much I have lost!" Yeah, LADY you tend to fluctuate really badly with your weight, I FRIGGEN STABILIZE!!!! More proof that hCG is a life changer and even changes your metabolism so it actually WORKS!! <3 my hCG. 
While I'm still talking, does anyone else feel like they should become a laxative junkie? Like seriously. Sometimes it just doesn't come for days and you try everything you possibly can, extra fiber, upping the veggies, psyllium husk, skinny/poop tea, or WHATEVER, and it doesn't work!? I usually keep a bottle of that magnesium citrate stuff around (flavored epsom salt water) and it works withing like 30mins, or overnight/during the night if you drink it before bed. Without that shit sometimes I don't poo FOREVER. 

Does anyone know of a good detox? Like a pill or a fruit juice flush or whatever? Bah, I'm probably too lazy for all that anyways, I tried the juicing thing and it didn't make me poop or feel "young and refreshed and vibrant" or whatever those people and diet Nazis (yes I'm talking about some of you) say it does. at least with my reviews and experiences I'm honest. Not just going around saying the same thing everyone else does!

So I think I'm about done with my post for the day, about to scrounge up some thinspiration for the weekend. Many thanks to my new followers for your support!

Christmas - FAIL - Waiting for New Years!

So a round before Xmas was apparently not the best idea, actually I've learned a very good lesson just in case I'm still dieting towards Halloween next year 2012, DO NOT DIET AROUND HALLOWEEN OR AFTER!!! lmao.
I seem to be stabilized around 238 so that's fine except that I'm 9lbs above my lowest weight from the Halloween Challenge.. Ok technically over that even since I did get down to 225.5, but we'll stick with the 229.5 lol since it makes me feel better about my gain.

We are starting a New Years Challenge Dec 30-Jan 1(load days) for 21+ days, so I'm going to completely clean out the house and make this round count and get fucking skinny like I should already be right now instead of still being a fatass. If I didn't fuck around and be so naughty I could have made goal already and be wearing those fucking size 5 skinny jeans I have hanging on my bedroom wall that hubby's neice gave me.

Oh well. I still have until July (when the girls and I are going to Las Vegas together) to get spine skinny and ready for bikinis and daquiris, so hopefully I'll stop fucking around this year.
This will be my first time ever making a New Year's Resolution, let alone a NYR for DIETING! I'm not really a resolution sort of person, but it's time for a fucking change and I love the confidence I gain as I look healthier and less....StayPuft. Lol.

I'm going to be looking at more thinspiration like I used to, hoping this will keep me on task since I used to do alot better when I was actively looking at and posting thinspo.
I'm also going to try to keep up with updates on here and also with video updates on YouTube.

Wish me luck, and I hope you all have a not so naughty Christmas, and a skinny fucking New Year!!!

Christmas Round VLCD 4

Mixing a new vial tonight since the one I've been using is finally empty (I mixed it a few weeks ago and ended up deciding I wasn't ready for P2 so I froze it.... twice... ).
Anyways, I'm thinking the vial I've been using is dead from being frozen and thawed excessively, and hoping that I'll stop having this craving/hunger thing and start losing better, meaning I want WEIGHT not INCHES.
For the Halloween round it went hella slow like this one is doing, but I lost almost 8" one week and ten pounds the next week, which was awesome yeah, I fit back into my pre-preg pants I haven't warn in 3 years, I'm wearing L-XL dresses and leggings, and ALMOST fit into a size 17 in juniors' jeans. But I really want to get out of the 200s!!!

My weight as of today is 237, and I did have bites of carbs here and there today, but I'm hoping not enough to make me gain. I am down from my load weight of 242.5 so that good at least and it's only my 3rd loss day.
My LIW from my P3 was 235 and also what I stabilized at (was basically a P4).
Would like to have done better in my last round and better in that first P3 I did after the Halloween round, but I did gain about 10# (238), then lost 3 and stabilized in this last half at 235.
I'm really trying to push for working this round. Hubby is giving me great support and yelling at me when I even think about cheating, so that's good, my past rounds have been a laugh because he wasn't supportive at all and I cheated alot.

Also, I've been eating mainly beef, which could be the reason my losses are sucking so badly. I need to pick up some chicken and ground turkey, last round when I made turkey goulash I dropped 4# instantly and I was basically nursing on that all day, probably about .5lb of ground turkey meat with chilis, bell peppers, onions, tomatoes/sauce, even a few noodles here and there. And it wasn't a fluke because the next couple of days I lost 3# each (that was the 10# I lost in the Halloween round). And mixing veggies doesn't work for me, normally it makes me gain.

So there's my update. Also, I've been checking out some more thinspiration because that seems to keep me in check, I'm thinking the dieting will be easier in a couple of weeks when my classes are finished for the winter, Chinese is done next week  (Dec 8) and my other classes are done the week after. (Dec 12-16)

Halloween Challenge VLCD 7 - SICK

Yes, I spent this weekend trying to "Miniload" and went out partying and having fun for the first time in almost 4 years.
Got up to 242.6 (from 237) and this morning I was 238 again. AND YESTERDAY I WENT TO OLIVE GARDEN! I had the never-ending pasta bowl!

I'm dead sick, and feel like crap, for info see ---> my VLOG <--- Click There

So today I've had the leftovers from OG, a 7oz full fat Fage, organic tortilla chips, and Campbell's chicken noodle soup. I'm going to have half a cantaloupe before bed to counteract the salt from the soup and hope all that crap doesn't hurt me too much, but I'm sick and when you're sick you want to be pampered.

I did go to Fry's and Whole Foods tonight and got some soups (broccoli and Portobello Mushrooms) and Coconut Flour to make P(technically 3) sticky rolls, that I'm going to make and eat tomorrow (would that count as part of a fat fast?) ...I bought some half and half just in case it would - cream costs too much.

I made some Choco D (cocoa crack) with peanut butter tonight. It was just like a dark chocolate Reeses! YUM.
I've been making Cocoa crack waaaay too well these past couple of weeks, I'm becoming addicted. And I don't even like it! lol. Maybe Tom is lurking somewhere, even though I thought he just left like the day I started Loading...a week ago.
Maybe it's jsut because I'm sick and feel like a giant baby.

Anyways it's jsut about bedtime so I better get going, sorry I've been MIA!!
School is kicking my ass!!!

Beer is BAD

I had three pints of PBR (Pabst Blue Ribbon) last night, and a pretty good amount of peanuts, and OVERNIGHT, GAINED 4LBS!!!
I was floored.

So I had Seafood pasta tonight and tomorrow I'm doing an egg day and this week I will be replacing meals with juicing.

There's my crappy update of the day lol.

Steak Day P3

So today was easy to do a steak day since I was preoccupied all day with studying and schoolwork! Oh yeah, and going to my classes.

So I spent all morning studying History (from 8.30a-1.30p), then went to History class (@3p), went to class, got home around 4.30p, studied my Chinese from 4.30p-6.15p, printed out some Chinese worksheets for writing characters, went to class (7-10p), Stopped on the way home and got a carne asada burrito with only pico de gallo as my steak day.

Took my History quiz, got 95% because of a stupid trick question, that if my teacher REALLY went by the book, I would have gotten 100% on!!!! Bahhhh


So I'm hoping for a loss tomorrow, especially after my stupid 2# gain this morning, that was ridiculous.
Proud moment of the day?
My friend in Chinese class opened up a Kashi granola bar, I looked into my purse at Stacy's brownie from when we went out last night, and I closed my purse and put it on the floor and forgot all about the brownie until I got home and finished my burrito.
Still have NOT touched it!!! =]

The Force has been strong with me today, 555. ("ha ha ha" - Thai "lol")

What I Ate 8/16/11

95% lean hamburger 100g
1 slice American cheese
2 slices onion

hot dog
SF chocolate pudding

totino's party pizza

50% fat for the day - does that mean if I eat 230 more cals of just fat, I can classify today as a fat fast day? =P

Today's total: 777cals


YEAH YEAH I'm not proud of it but that's what I ate, and I'll probably lose, but don't you try it because most people wouldn't lose with half the stuff I eat on P2.

About To See New Numbers!!!

DOWN 2LBS TODAY!!!! So I'm feeling back on track, FINALLY!
Back to where I was when I went to my dad's and ate WHATEVER FELL IN FRONT OF MY FACE.
So , if I lose just 1lb in the morning, I'LL BE SEEING NEW (not previously lost) WEIGHT!!!


OMFG I HATE THE FREAKING INTERNET!!!!!!
I had this entire blog written out and I pushed "publish", and POOOOOOOF!
FUCKING GOOGLE BASTARDS!!!!!
STOP BUYING EVERYTHING I LOVE AND FUCKING IT UP!!!!
I HATE YOU GOOGLE PEOPLE!!!!
(Did I mention that Google flipping ruined YouTube as well? YouTube used to be good before Google bought it and effed it all up.)


Ok, back to re-writing my blog.

So I don't know what I'm going to for meals or eating today. I might have a hamburger for lunch and then have 3 hard boiled eggs for dinner again.
I was thinking about doing 4-1 scoop protein shakes instead of meals for the rest of the week to kick this weight. I could do it every other day, meals, shakes, meals, shakes...
I need to really get rid of 10# this last week I have left of HCG, so I'll be in the 220s for next round (Halloween challenge).

I might do a mini load on Friday or Saturday, to kick start the last week's losses....Unless this is my last week, then I'm screwed. It's all going to go by however much HCG I have left. So I need to kick it into gear RIGHT NOW. To get where I need to be. Losing weight I've already lost is soooooo retarded!!!!! I hate myself for letting it happen. 3 TIMES THESE PAST MONTHS (July-August).
I've only lost 13lbs since July 5th!!!! Ridiculous!
I need to get my ass in gear and get to work on losing this fat if I really want to make it to goal by next spring. I should be able to make it to the 130s by Christmas!!!! BUT I'VE GOT TO GET MY ASS IN CHECK!!!

Dun-Dun-Dunnnnnn =]

Soooooo I'm only up 4.5lbs!!!
Which I Think is AWESOME!!!! For all the stuff I ate while at my dad's.
Hubby saved me some "Strawberry Chicken Salad" I'm going to try today, it looks really creepy, but I'll try it, and yes its a salad with strawberries and a little thingy of chicken salad - with MAYO, I don't think the little bit of fat will hurt though, it's REAALLLLY tiny. So we'll find out, and I might add in some protein by having a strawberry shake for my drink with my salad (make the strawberries in the salad less noticeable - I HOPE - I'm not big on fruit being in my salad).

WOOPS: UPDATE - OK, I TOTALLY FORGOT! - I'm doing a Fage-day today, because I have about 6 of those little full fat Fage cups (bought on sale $1/ea =] ) that I put in one big container and I need to eat it before it goes bad.
So this will be an interesting day, I HATE FAGE - IT'S GROSS - LIKE EATING CREAM CHEESE.

OH YEAH - If you read my blog, don't forget to FOLLOW IT! =] Thanks.

In other news, last night I opened my present from my friend Catthai!!!

This was sooooo EXCITING for me =]

It's supposed to remind me of my plans and what I want to do:

(learn Thai, Visit Thailand, Get degree, teach in Asia, etc etc etc...)

So, everytime I look up I see it and I'm reminded to get things done!!

She also sent me stevia because it gives her headaches and I've never used it before!

(I always use Truvia, Saccharin, or PureVia)



I'm finding it hard to be patient about waiting for my Skin79 BB Cream lol. Oh well I can hold out for 2 more weeks, right? One more reason I hate buying things online lol, I have to wait for them to arrive!!

Ok off to inject my hCG, loving my new tiny needles!

The one on the left (bigger and longer) is what I normally use,

The one on the left (TINY) is what my friend gave me.

Normal: 100cc, 28ga, .5" - Prick and a little sting if you don't poke it in perfectly

New: 50cc, 31ga, .25" - CAN'T FEEL IT AT ALL!!! No discomfort!

These small ones probably wont work for you people who inject A LOT of liquid

(I only inject at .15-.17 for 150-175iu - anything more to me is creepy)

Ok NOW I'M GOING!!!

Have a great day, I'll update later with my intake and feelings for the day =]

VLCD6

Apparently the cantaloupe yesterday was a bad idea. Goose egg today (no loss & no gain).

Today I have a job interview with ULTA at 4:30p, hope it goes well, but not really worried about since I just did the application for kicks, not for an actual job, or results, but it would be nice to get out of the house. Even for work. Plus, I love beauty products lol, it should just be like my old job at TradeSecret. I think my friend Paige worked there at one time. (ULTA I mean)
I think the interview's at 4:30p, I'm going to call ahead to make sure it's not 4p.
I still need to find the car keys too lol.

SO ANYWAYS:
Michelle and I are going to do POP (perfectly on protocol) for the rest of the week and see how that treats us. Hopefully I'll lose awesomely. HOPEFULLY. =]

VLCD5

DOWN 2#!!!!
Makes me feel alot better after .5 and .5 this weekend.
But I still feel like doing some sort of load/mini-steak day or something just to kick the losses up a bit.

An hour later:
Ok, I decided to do a week of more strict POP - 500-800 cals (probably 500 since that's what I'm used to and I'm paranoid about straying from Dr. Simeons).
My friend Michelle is going to do a week of POP, so I thought it would be a good idea to be like a buddy system.

I just realized yesterday I had 2 slices of bacon and a Carbmaster yogurt, corn tortillas and everything and I lost 2# over the .5# that I've been losing.
I wonder what's up with that.


Another hour later:
I am so slacking on my bloggin today, I keep getting sidetracked!!!

So I keep getting poeple telling me to VLOG.
I don't want to VLOG. lol. Vllllogggg. Yeah, no thanks!
I think just to make my friends happy, I will do at least 1 VLOG when I get a new computer with a webcam. As of now, I don't have a cam besides my phone, and I tried vlogging with that and it did not work out well. I think maybe the lighting in my house sucks and MY VOICE IS FUCKING UGLY!! Michelle says it's not, but I hate how I sound recorded on stuff. If I didn't I would have popped out a record by now lol. I love how I sound, but I don't like how I sound played back after being recorded.
Sorry, lots of cussing, I hate my voice lol, I sound like a man I think. Apparently not so, but I think so so there you go =]



My awesome friend MICHELLE!

VLCD4 ad What I Ate 7/31/2011

Down .5 from my guess of -.5 yesterday. Or I could have stalled yesterday and lost a whole pound today. Don't know, not worried about it.
I weighed at midday and I was down another 1.5#, so I'm hoping that's a good sign for the morning.

I'm thinking of doing a Fage day or Mini-load....fat fast? SOMETHING tomorrow, to jump start my losses again. I'll take a look at P2 correction/cheat ideas right now before I go to bed, I'm having a hard time keeping my eyes open!

Strawberry Protein Shake - 163 cals
Bacon - 70 cals
SF Yogurt - 60 cals

Beef Fajita Filling - 126 cals
2 Corn Tortillas - 105 cals

1 SF Gello Cup - 5 cals

For a total of: 529 calories!

VLCD3 and What I Ate 7/30/11

I'm guessing I lost about .5lb because I forgot to weigh this morning and didn't gain with clothes on, so I'm guessing I lost at least .5, it's whatever, I had pizza and a vodka/diet coke last night so I feel like that was good.

Our air-conditioner is broken which is illegal! in the state of Arizona.
I halfway feel like calling the cops and forcing them to get it fucking fixed, but I'm not the call the cops kind of person, I'm lazy.

Here's what I ate today (I was out all day so I did the best I could):
McDonald's Bacon Ranch Salad - 230 cals
Subway Grilled chicken salad - About 130 cals
Half of a Subway White Chocolate Chip Macadamia Nut cookie - 110 cals
Oh and a few drinks of Minute Maid Light Pomegranate Lemonade - 5 cals

Total: 475 cals

Let's make it 515, It's hot and I'm going to have a Fudgsicle =]

What I Ate 7/29/11

WAY TOO MUCH.
1570 cals
endofstory.
lol.

going to bed now, hoping for the best, not a loss but hopefully not a big gain. Maybe I'll be loading this weekend. Don't know for sure yet. As you should know by now, my mind is never made up until it happens. I will probably go MEGA P2 for the rest of the weekend and get into the 230s.

P2 VLCD2 -4#

Yes, that's right DOWN 4 POUNDS BEE-OTCHES!!! OVERNIGHT!
Booyah!

Feeling good.
I was mentally starving last night, but now I feel like I can rule the world. That's the one thing this diet is awesome because of, INSTANT RESULTS AND REWARDS FOR BEING GOOD! I only went over 500 cals by 10 cals,  which is great for me.
I might skip the eggs this morning, it took me forever to eat the egg whites yesterday, and I almost gagged like 4 times, egg whites are gross unless they're made into a sandwich with toast.


I'll update later, I'm going to have an orange I've been up 2 hours without anything to eat.