R3P2D4?

Jan 5, 2012

3 eggs whites, 1 yolk
2tbs homemade salsa
9oz chicken breast
2 cups lettuce
2 diet hansens soda
3.5oz chicken breast
2tbs homemade salsa
650kcals, 92.6 protein, 25.5 fat, 7.6 carbs



Have I mentioned that I'm just going to call this round #3 even though it's like #8? Lol.

I have alot of weight to lose by this summer when I meet up with all of my dieting buddies in Las Vegas, NV. 108.5lbs to be exact, by mid-June if possible. It is possible. I'm doing the hCG diet afterall... I wish I would have stuck to the diet during the Fall and holidys this winter. But I didn't so I'm still stuck around the same weight as I was last July basically. I kick myself because I could have been at ultimate goal by now and I am down only like 7-10lbs since July 2012.


I got down to 228.5 and worked my way back to 240. Can we say FAILURE?
But I'm doing well so far this round. It's VLCD 5 and I'm down 6lbs. Today I did a high protein day so I'm hoping for a big loss in the morning, here's to hoping. -crosses fingers-

My friend, who is just a litte bit taller than I, says at 130 she's between a size 0-4. I'm hoping when I get there I will be too, but I know I will be at least a size 7-10. At least I'll be over 100lbs lighter than I was at this time last year. And it's still comforting to know that I have lost almost 40lbs and kept it off, I'm not worried about any of it coming back, but after Vegas this summer I will probably do a short short round just to acquire a buffer zone for any gains I might encounter.
I can't wait to be skinny for the first time in my life and I know that in order to make it to any of my goals I have to keep to the plan and stay on track and on protocol. NO CHEATING!!!! If I have to live off of protein shakes for 6 months by-golly I will!!!

Can't Sleep

So I took a few sleeping pills, watched a couple of movies, went pee a few times, and I still can't sleep, so now I'm listening to some sort of "documentary" or "self help" video talking bout health and weight loss and I've compiled a few photos for late night thinspiration so I don't go and gorge on something, I DID however, eat an apple before doing so.

When I weighed before the apple I weighed the same as this morning, hoping for a big los in the morning =]

And tomorrow I will do a protein day possibly.

Food for today:

1 cup Turkey Chili/Goulash

1 cup 0% Fage

3 strawberries

2 gingerbread cookies (60 cals)

1 42oz bottle of orange flavored mineral water

Total: around 550kcals

VLCD 4..or 3.. oh well. SKINNIFYING IN PROCESS!

So I just hooked up to my other neighbour-friend's internet #1 because in 1.5 weeks I'll be abck in school and need the net, #2 because i need to update my HCG group's stuff and keep track of the weights and keep them posted and stuff....
AND I need to vlog and blog haha.

So I'm down to 238.5 from my high of 244.5, 6lbs in 5 days.
Not bad, especially considering that most of those days were loading days.
I'm ready for next week and hopefully being back into the 220s so I can blow out of those and make my January goal of 210lbs.
If I don't stick to my goals I wont make it to my July goal of 135-130! So I have to really push myself to be good on this round. And right now I should be chugging a ton of water but I'm slacking. So I'll try to drown myself later tonight, right now I really don't feel like water.
I feel that today's weight didn't drop so much as I expected because I drank 3 cans of Hansen's DIET soda yesterday, so I'm trying to keep myself away from that (excessively) today.
I had my turkey chili/goolash stuff for lunch and if I have dinner I think I'm just going to have egg whites and salsa. Or 1 egg + 2 whites and salsa. Maybe an apple but I haven't decided yet.

Yesterday I came to roughly 560 cals.
Today I'm hoping to stay under 500kcals.
I have to stay in control like in my beginning rounds or I go crazy and cheat all over the place!!!!
So I'm trying to stay POP/MOP and NOT CHEAT. Not even CocoaCrack! (Choco D) because that shit can get out of hand FAST. I have 6 months to get all of this weight off before summer and by Jiminey I'm GOING TO DO IT THIS TIME!!! I might even do what some others are doing and just keep going until it's completely gone. But we'll see how I feel. I don't want to take breaks anymore because I realise now that it gets me into the wrong mindset and it's damn near impossible to get back into protocol/dieting mode!!

I am planning on taking sleeping pills every night until I run out so I don't get those dreaded night cravings and cave into defeat! Finally found my magic sleeping pill number - 5! I have to take 5 just to get drowsy. They're OTC so that's probably why. Wish I could afford Ambien like my friend Jo lol. I need some knockout meds!!!

Anyways, I'm feeling good and can't wait for next week. Might check in before then, but with me you never know haha. No seriously I'll probably be back and write again on Friday, I should probably measure then to, I haven't measured since the Halloween round began.
I hate getting fat again.
I can't wait to fit into the pants I bought last year that I thought would be too big by now, and would have if I had just stuck to the plan!!!!!

I'm my own worst [dieting]enemy.

12/30/12 - Day before actual "LOAD"

I've decided to take my injections starting today so the HCG can be sure and get into my system. (I still have to get it out of the freezer but anyways...)
By Monday all the bad food should be completely out of my house (whether eaten or thrown out or given away, whatever.), and Monday I will start VLCDs.
So excited to be back on a strict 500kcal diet, you have no idea! This past week I have just been sick at the thought of food (and certain smells, and my cigarettes, making me wonder about pregnancy and contemplating suicide, lmfao jk don't get your panties in a bunch.) But for real, I refuse to accept pregnancy anymore, and I'm half-contemplating staying on hCG continuously until I reach goal, half hoping to build an immunity against it as a precaution against future pregnancy. (Yes, that's what immunity actually does, it causes you to have problems staying pregnant because your body sees the hCG and stuff "down there" as a threat. I.E: Can cause miscarriage.) I've decided as long as I'm with "hubby" I refuse to have any more children. I would like to find a mate that I am compatible and IN-LOVE WITH before I have another child(or children).

Moving on:

I'm really excited to start this new year with a fresh start and it's exciting that this will be my first ever "New Year's Resolution"!!!! So yeah, I'm pretty stoke about that anyways, and stoked to have so much to look forward to this year including my Las Vegas trip this summer with my other dieting girlfriends (by which time I should have hopefully at least reached 130 - 15lbs from my ultimate goal of 115).

I am sick of letting myself be mine own enemy and I refuse to let me sabotage myself. LOL. That sounds even crazier than all the things I've stated above, but it's true, I am my own worst enemy (besides the obvious fatness). I need to get busy today and this weekend and clean out all of my cupboards or eat all the bad shit for loading on Sunday (I think I'll just drink tomorrow haha...yeah I wish, I don't drink. =/ ) and On Monday all that should be left in my house is P2 foods!! I'm hoping - we're kind of broke until next week (7 Jan) so I'm going to make the best out of what we do have around the house - chicken and beef, possibly some broccoli, I think I have some frozen and canned veggies like peas and grean beans, even though those aren't P2, at least they're GREEN. I have my slide show thinspo going along on my computer background/wallpaper thingy, so everyday I am reminded about my goal and the fact that I really need to step it up the rest of this winter and for Spring and lose this fucking weight so I can be hot for the first time ever in time for summer!!! I mean, I'm fucking gorgeous, but I really need a body that fits my face like my mother has been telling me since I got fat when I was like 7-8. "You'd be so pretty if you lost some of that weight honey." Plus, if I'm ever going to go home to Idaho and see my Aunt & Uncle and my other Uncle and my skinny friggen metal-head cousins, I WANT TO BE FUCKING SKINNY. Especially to rub it in my Aunt's face that I'm not the fat one of the family anymore. I'm sick of being the fat one in the family, you know? I'm sick of her diet food and her "Why don't you join weight watchers, look how much I have lost!" Yeah, LADY you tend to fluctuate really badly with your weight, I FRIGGEN STABILIZE!!!! More proof that hCG is a life changer and even changes your metabolism so it actually WORKS!! <3 my hCG. 
While I'm still talking, does anyone else feel like they should become a laxative junkie? Like seriously. Sometimes it just doesn't come for days and you try everything you possibly can, extra fiber, upping the veggies, psyllium husk, skinny/poop tea, or WHATEVER, and it doesn't work!? I usually keep a bottle of that magnesium citrate stuff around (flavored epsom salt water) and it works withing like 30mins, or overnight/during the night if you drink it before bed. Without that shit sometimes I don't poo FOREVER. 

Does anyone know of a good detox? Like a pill or a fruit juice flush or whatever? Bah, I'm probably too lazy for all that anyways, I tried the juicing thing and it didn't make me poop or feel "young and refreshed and vibrant" or whatever those people and diet Nazis (yes I'm talking about some of you) say it does. at least with my reviews and experiences I'm honest. Not just going around saying the same thing everyone else does!

So I think I'm about done with my post for the day, about to scrounge up some thinspiration for the weekend. Many thanks to my new followers for your support!

Getting Ready for New Years!

Finding it really hard not to inject myself and start the round already, but I will wait until the weekend to load... -whine whine whine-

I'm actually down 1.5lbs today so I'm 243.5lbs. This is still what 8lbs above my LIW? Not something to brag about, but I didn't gain a ton of weight, just about 1lb/day for a week (average). That I can live with, I don't want to think about the fact that I actually put on those pounds since like Thursday or something.

So, I've decided I'm going to attempt to get a goal in of 40lbs every 40 days (1lb/day ave) if I can, I don't know it that's what my actual "goal" I had written up looked like or not, but I figure some people can do it and maybe I can, hCG is a miraculous thing afterall, IDK if it's THAT miraculous though haha...
Let's see that would change my goals to about:
End of these months:
Jan: 210
Feb: 194
Apr: 151
June: Ultimate Goal Weight (120-114.5)
Skinny by Summer!

Of course this is a stretch, so I'll think about the 1lb/day, but stick with my originaly goal by July of like 130.

I just need to stay focused on losing and not lose sight of that!!!
I need to cut my crap and stop fucking cheating and being a fatass. I have to do this, and if I don't get it finished by Vegas I will end up giving up and getting fucking mammoth-sized again.
I need to set my mini goals and stick to them this time.
Weekly goals even, maybe 10lbs the first week of a round, 6lbs weekly thereafter. That's at least 28lbs/month. With 4 active months of losing that would bring me down to 130 like is my goal. So I have to keep those things in sight or I'll spin out of control.

It's a new year, I need to be better and have more control!!!!

Thinspo:

Christmas Day 2011

So I thought I should update for today, I am 10lbs over my LIW of 235.5, I thoguht it was 7 but I think that was yesterday. I don't even want to think about what tomorrow's weight will be like but it's whatever, holidays are finally over (besides New Years), and this week I'm going to be working on (eating everything in the house) cleaning out the cupboards full of carbs and starting anew for the new year!

Today I had prime rib, mashed potatoes and gravy, mac and cheese, choco-chip cookies, cake, fudge, and .... i don't know. I didn't eat alot altogether but I'm sure it will add up especially since I had some soda and for some reason soda has been making me gain the most over this past week.

Anywys I wanted to take a minute and wish the world a Merry Christmas! Hope you all had a great holiday and enjoy the rest of the week.

Christmas

Merry Christmas!!!!

Let's Make It A Skinny New Year!!!!